Chapter 1: The Hidden Beginning
In that tranquil yet traditionally conservative American countryside, the morning light slowly cascades over the scattered cottages and the vast fields. Ethan and Lucas grew up in this land, their story shrouded in the morning mist, hazy yet filled with helplessness.
During high school, they should have been carefree youths reveling in their youth, but the unique emotional inclinations deep within them complicated their relationship. Ethan had deep, expressive eyes that sparkled with curiosity about the world and dreams for the future. He excelled academically, quick-witted, and his vibrant presence could be seen in both classroom problem-solving and organizing school activities. Lucas, on the other hand, was tall and sturdy, radiating an untamed aura. He dominated the sports field, a star athlete in the spotlight, yet when facing Ethan, his wildness was tinged with an indescribable gentleness and shyness.
In the school hallways, they often brushed past each other, their seemingly casual glances quickly averted, as if afraid that others might uncover their inner secrets. In class, they occasionally argued over differing viewpoints, their heated exchanges hiding a deep concern and attention for one another. Once, during a class discussion on literary interpretation, Ethan presented a unique and profound insight. Though Lucas secretly agreed, he instinctively countered.
"Your idea is too idealistic; it doesn't match reality," Lucas frowned.
"You just haven't fully grasped the author's intent; you only see the surface," Ethan shot back defiantly.
Their back-and-forth drew the attention of their classmates. When the teacher ultimately affirmed Ethan's viewpoint, Lucas felt an inexplicable joy surge within him, a feeling that transcended mere competition. After class, they would often unexpectedly meet in the library corner, pretending to focus on their books while secretly stealing glances at each other.
"You come here often," Ethan broke the silence softly.
"Yeah, it's quieter here," Lucas replied somewhat awkwardly.
As time passed, their feelings for each other deepened, yet the traditional values of the countryside loomed like an invisible wall between them. Here, homosexuality was neither understood nor accepted, and the expectations of family and the judgment of neighbors felt like heavy shackles, preventing them from daring to overstep boundaries.
After graduation, both Ethan and Lucas entered the fiercely competitive advertising industry. In this challenging and opportunity-filled field, they found themselves rivals once more. In the bustling city advertising firms, they worked hard, trying to fill the void within themselves through professional success.
During a crucial advertising project bid meeting, both their companies were determined to win. Ethan burned the midnight oil, meticulously preparing a highly creative advertising proposal. In the conference room, he confidently showcased his ideas, vividly describing the promising prospects of the ad campaign with eloquent language and stunning visuals. Lucas, however, approached from a market research perspective, presenting a rigorous and comprehensive marketing strategy, rich with data and thorough analysis. Both proposals had their merits, leaving the judges deep in thought. As they awaited the results, Ethan nervously clenched his fists, while Lucas appeared calm, gazing out the window, though his slightly trembling fingers betrayed his inner turmoil. Ultimately, Ethan's company won the project due to the novelty of his creativity.
"Congratulations, your idea was indeed impressive," Lucas said as he approached Ethan, his eyes carrying a complex emotion.
"Thanks, you were great too; you almost had me beat," Ethan replied, feeling a mix of emotions.
Behind this seemingly fierce competition, there were moments of tenderness and understanding whenever they crossed paths on the city streets at night. They would stroll side by side under the dim streetlights, discussing life's troubles and work pressures, but never mentioning the deep-seated love they harbored for one another.
"Work has been exhausting lately; those clients are really difficult," Ethan complained.
"Yeah, but it's something we have to go through; after all, we chose this field," Lucas agreed.
However, the pressure from their families loomed large. Ethan's parents began arranging blind dates for him, hoping he would settle down and continue the family lineage. Faced with their eager eyes and traditional views, Ethan fell into deep pain and struggle. He knew he couldn't go against his parents' wishes, yet he couldn't let go of his feelings for Lucas.
At a family gathering, Ethan was introduced to a rural girl named Emily. Emily had soft, golden hair, a pretty face, and a gentle, kind personality. She was smitten with Ethan, while he could only force a smile and engage in polite conversation.
"What do you usually like to do?" Emily shyly asked.
"Oh, just reading; work keeps me busy," Ethan replied dismissively.
Seeing his parents' satisfied smiles felt like a gash tearing through Ethan’s heart, bleeding profusely. After the gathering, he sat alone in the yard, gazing at the starry sky, tears welling in his eyes.
Meanwhile, Lucas faced a similar predicament. His family held a high status in the community, and his elders were keenly focused on his marriage. They had chosen a suitable girl for him and urged him to get engaged soon. Lucas tried to resist, but under the pressure of family expectations and rural traditions, his resistance felt futile. When he met the girl chosen by his family, he was always distracted, his mind filled with thoughts of Ethan.
Ethan and Emily's relationship gradually grew; they attended village markets together and walked through the fields. Emily excitedly shared snippets of rural life with Ethan, while he remained distracted.
"Look at those flowers over there; they bloom so beautifully," Emily said cheerfully.
"Yeah, they are beautiful," Ethan replied, his gaze wandering.
When Lucas spent time with his family’s chosen girl, he also appeared cold and distant. His heart was occupied solely by thoughts of Ethan, the one who had argued with him in high school and competed with him in the advertising industry; he was the person Lucas truly longed to be with for life.
One day, unable to bear the torment within, Lucas went to Ethan's home to find him.
"We can't go on like this, Ethan; we need to find a way," Lucas said urgently.
"What can we do? Our families, this village, won't accept us," Ethan shook his head helplessly.
"But I don't want to lose you; I can't watch you marry someone else," Lucas's eyes reddened.
"I don't want that either, but I don't have the courage to face my family's disappointed gazes," Ethan lowered his head in pain.
They fell silent, the weight of their breaths echoing in the room.
As Ethan's relationship with Emily heated up, discussions about engagement were also brought to the forefront. Ethan became increasingly despondent, feeling himself sinking deeper into an inescapable quagmire. Watching Ethan change, Lucas’s pain and anger continued to build.
In the days leading up to Ethan's engagement, Lucas approached him again.
"Are you really going to marry her? Are you just giving up on us?" Lucas asked, his voice trembling.
"I have no choice, Lucas. I'm sorry," Ethan couldn't meet his eyes.
"Fine, if you've made your decision, I don’t want to stay here anymore," Lucas said through clenched teeth.
"Where will you go?" Ethan looked up, panic in his eyes.
"I don't know, but I can't watch you get engaged to someone else," Lucas said, turning to leave.
Ethan wanted to stop him but didn't know what to say. He watched Lucas's retreating figure, tears blurring his vision.
On the day of the engagement, Ethan went through the ceremony like a walking corpse. Though he wore a smile, his eyes reflected deep despair. At that moment, Lucas had already set off down the road to leave the village. He didn’t know what awaited him ahead, but he knew that if he stayed, his heart would be utterly shattered.